On Grammar

I developed an acute dislike of subjects I found especially boring in middle school. I discovered that, as my cynicism and disinterest with my education grew, so did my imagination and I soon became the Spaciest Person Ever. Hear something you don't like? Ignore it and ponder the theme of good versus evil in Teen Titans. Don't understand fractions? Doodle smilies and kittens on the worksheet. Mom yelling something about your messy room? Smile and nod while looking over her shoulder and playing your favorite song backwards in your mind. Such was my existence. What a rude kid.

So while most teenagers retain a firm grasp on subjects repeatedly hammered into our skulls since third grade, I remain completely oblivious to remedial things. Like grammar. Where do commas go? I usually just leave them out because I think they have potential to look pretentious/dumb but I'm finding that a general knowledge of the comma enigma would be helpful in life. Right now grammar's like this annoying kid in my neighborhood that's always banging on the back door asking to borrow some markers. I've learned to ignore it. But what if it actually turns out to be something important, like a notification that my house is on fire? Or my future as an Overall Successful Person? What if I spend way too much effort on this one college essay only to have the reviewer sit down and say: "Oh, this girl's pretty ambitious and uses some nice words, but her comma placement is atrocious. We can't have her littering our campus with her dirty run ons." What if the one thing I have absolutely no patience for turns out to be my only downfall?
Needless to say, I think it's about time Grammar and I make amends. I'll try to color inside the lines a bit as long as I'm allowed to jump off the page every once in a while. Because grammar is boring and some rules are just meant to be broken.
But I refuse to memorize any more prepositions.